Does your spouse or partner still “do it” for you?
When you’re driving home after work, do you lust for the one you’re with? You should.
I see many married or attached people coming to sites like ours and I have to wonder what happened to the lusty feelings that these two people once had. Why did they allow it to die?
Good sex doesn’t have to be complicated. In the beginning of most relationships couples may stay in bed for hours at a time talking, laughing, having sex, kissing, talking, having sex again, daydreaming, making out and maybe even having more sex. Desire, arousal, and passion – well, they’re seemingly effortless. No complications, couples just enjoy erotic fun and intimacy. So why can’t we keep it like that?
The old saying familiarity breeds contempt could come into play in some relationships. We forget why we fell for our partner in the first place. Can we get that feeling back after being hurt or angered? I don’t know. I do believe that we can get past most unpleasant bits in our relationship because underneath it all is a deep love and respect for one another.
I think it’s really easy to take our partner/spouse for granted. I think we all do it from time to time. Some way more so than others, I might add. Most of us live predictable lives and surround ourselves with familiar people, objects and places. In the beginning it was all new and exciting. Nothing predictable happened because there were so many things to discover about your partner. We stayed in an excited state of mind. We need to keep in mind the value of exciting, pleasurable sex.
It is important to realize that every single day you make a choice about your relationship. Every day that you stay with your partner you “re-choose” them whether consciously or unconsciously – but you do it. Perhaps it’s only to say, “I’ll give it 3 more months,” but it’s a choice none the less. If you think about going home and you feel no lust whatsoever for the person who’s waiting for you to arrive, it’s time to do something about it. Don’t let life slip through your fingers while you wait for things to get better. You can’t change people, you can only change yourself and that changes everything.
Your last line should be a bumper sticker or t-shirt. You nailed it. Great post.
Very well said. I think one of the worst things you can do is to take the other for granted. It may be hard, but who said that it is easy? Good things do not come easy.
“Just” foreplay is sex as well. I was recently taught this…so, my husband of 13 years and I make sure that we carve out sometime almost every evening…I hope that it continues until I’m an old broad!!
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Well I have to say yes to the question posed in the title of this post but our schedules make things rough. He works third shift and I work first. I am tired when he is fully awake.
I like your site.Thanks for this interesting article.
Hi,
We still got it going on. We will be married for 16 years this April. He gave me 3 beautiful children and I am happy. Have a great weekend!
that’s one of the assets for couples esp. the married ones. they have the assurance that even they leave each other for the good, there is still a factor, the “spark factor” when they meet again.