There can be great sex at any size
A woman wrote to me yesterday about a comment she’d received on her profile. Now she says she’s a BBW and her photos show her as a BBW and she’s never hinted that she’s anything other than a sexy big woman. The guy asked her if she had trouble having sex and wouldn’t she be better off if she lost some weight.
Understandably she was upset. There was no reason at all to send a message, even if it started off with “I’m respectfully curious,” if all it was intended to do was put her down for her size. He ended it with, “Is there no way to tone up a little, for yourself and your pleasure?”
There are heaps of men who love having a bigger woman as their partner. If a big woman wasn’t what this guy wanted all he had to do was “click” and go to another profile. We’re all attracted to something different, that’s why life works so well. Who’d want everyone to be the same?
Imagine if big women started visiting profiles of bald men or or men who can’t spell or men who wear glasses and told them that they’d be more attractive “if only…” They don’t do that because they know the value of respecting another human being — knowing none of us are perfect. I figure any man who has a problem with my size wouldn’t be boinking me in the first place.
Big women get really fed up with people who say, “Oh, you’ve got such a cute face. If you lost a few pounds you’d really be a man target.” Any woman who’s over the average size will have heard a variation of that line. It’s like they’re saying big women aren’t sexy or big women can’t have sex in all positions. I do NOT want to read, “I’m pretty sure the best position for a BBW is on a treadmill.” Got it?
Where romance and sexuality is concerned, women are women. Tall women, short women, skinny women, average sized women and big and really big women are all the same inside. We all have feelings and sexual desires. I’ve heard from women over the past 12 years here who have trouble with some sex positions because they’re too short and I’ve heard the same thing from tall women.
There is no rule that says, “Be thin or be sex deprived.” It’s just not so. Sexy people who want to have sex with each other will find positions that trip their triggers. Nature has it all worked out for us.
A sexy, confident woman is a treat for a man regardless of her size. There’s someone for everyone so if you find one that doesn’t trip your trigger, move on to one that does. Everyone will be happier when you do.
Great post! As a BBW myself, I would have probably come unglued over such a comment. You can be big and beautiful! And yes, many people find BBW extremely desirable. Thanks for the post affirming that we don’t all fit into one mold.
Thank you for standing up for women of all sizes everywhere. It gauls me when some men only want to date a super skinny super model, esp. when the guy if fat, bald, and mean spirited. Once I went out with a guy with half a face (Napalm damage) and he had the audacity to tell me I was unattractive because I was too fat. Has he looked in a mirror lately? Of all the people that should know better than to judge someone by their looks.
Anyway, keep up the good work.
I totally agree with you. You know what is worst than that? My own mom telling me that I should lose weight so I can find a good boyfriend. And that’s not the worst part. I’m already engaged and she is still telling me this stuff. It drives me crazy how she can criticize me like that even though she is the same weight as me. Her excuse is “I already have a man.” Hello, so do I. But yeahh, sorry for ranting. My mom upsets me a lot. But I really agree with you. I hate when guys say stuff like that.