My rant about sexy

Ok, as you all know, I run a large adult dating site and we have lots of members looking for new partners. Over the years I have been amazed that so many men think that if a woman feels sexy she must by definition be a slut. It drives me nuts. Our site is so mild compared to others in our niche. We exist to acknowledge that sex is a part of every healthy relationship. It’s not all of a relationship, nor is it even a huge part, but we consider it to be one of the most important parts.

We started SexyAds after my husband and I met through a personal ad on the net in 1994. The WWW didn’t exist in Orlando at the time, nor was it in my husband’s town in Australia. We met through a newsgroup and then chatted on an old MUD chatroom. It was certainly “the old days” of the Internet. We had both been through a sexless marriage and were both determined that our next relationship would have a healthy dose of passion and intimacy. I’m not talking about sex, sex, sex, but a relationship where there are lots of hugs and kisses and ass patting and smiling at each other. Fortunately we found it.

I traveled 10,000 miles for our first date and I’d do it again tomorrow. Fast forward and now nearly 14 years later, we’re still kissing, hugging, smiling and we don’t miss out on the ass patting either.

So why do these men write to perfectly normal women who consider themselves sexy and say things like, “come fuck me and then leave, we’ll both be happy”? They wouldn’t say that to a strange woman in the grocery store — but I suppose the anonymity of the net makes everything seem ok. It’s not.

A woman who’s been on our site for about 4 months wrote to me today and was very upset because she was clear in her ad that she considered herself to be really sexy and wanted a man that would encourage that side of her. She said she did not want to get any photos except face pics. But what did she get in yesterday’s mail?

“I can encourage your sexy side you fucking slut. If you want to be trained in sex I’ve got the hardware.” To prove it he sent a private photo of his dick.

I just shake my head in wonder sometimes. These same men who write this shit then complain to us that we don’t have any real women. The “real women” who would answer emails like those are about .00038% of all women seeking relationships. Most women just delete the offensive emails and move on.

If you’re a guy and you’re looking for a woman for any kind of relationship, it’s all about respect. The men who treat women well, get most of the dates. I’ve seen men in our chatrooms and forums pick up dates left and right, because they pay attention to what the women want. If a woman considers herself sexy — relish, nurture and treasure that and she’ll stay sexy forever.