From UC Davis study revealed that men dont always hear what women say. I know I couldn’t believe it either! LOL Can you believe they wasted good grant money to study something we already know?

According to the study, when a man and woman are making out and she says, Its getting late, what she means is, Help me find my bra. Its time to go home.

The study says that men hear something entirely different.

To them, Its getting late, comes across as, Lets skip the foreplay and get right to the good stuff. The fact that some men continue to underestimate the value of foreplay is still a mystery to me, but there it is in black and white.

The Davis study implies that men interpret what women say by trying to imagine what they would mean. In other words, the only reason a man can imagine himself saying Its getting late while making out is to let the woman know its time to speed things up. I confess this interpretation never occurred to me, but upon reading it, I can see where men may have a point.

This got me to thinking, what other situations do women say X and men hear Y? –or maybe the other way around.

When she says, Lets just be friends, she really means, Lets stay in touch in case I need to borrow your truck to pick up a couch I bought on Ebay.

When he says it, he really means, Lets stay in touch because I still want us to have sex, but I dont want to spend holidays with your family or buy you birthday presents.

When she says, Were free to date other people, what she really means is, Im dating this other guy I like more, but hes afraid to commit, which probably means hes seeing someone he likes more and if thats true, Im going to stop seeing him and only see you.

When he says it, he means, Im keeping my options open in case Sharon Stone is looking for a new man. FYI, ladies, some men keep their options open right up until the last stripper leaves the bachelor party.

When she says, Lets just cuddle, she means it.

When he says it, he really means, I got some earlier and Im straight.

When she says, Not tonight, I have a headache, she really means, I got some earlier and Im straight.

She might also mean, The last time we did it, it wasnt so great and Id rather not have sex than have bad sex and I was afraid to mention it because my birthdays coming up and Im expecting you to buy me a present.

When he says, Not tonight, I have a headache, he means it.

Now fellas, pay close attention because the next two are tricky.

If in the middle of making out she says, I just got my hair done, what she means is, If youre willing to pay for me to get my do re-done, we can do it. If not, get off me.

If in the middle of making out, she says, I dont want to mess my hair up, what shes saying is, If youre cool with me just laying here, ok. If not, get off me.

If he says either of the above, it doesnt matter what he really meansjust run, woman, run!

Finally, when she says, I do, what she means is, Thank God, now I dont have to go to parties alone.

When he says it, he really means, Thank God, now someone else can do my laundry.

Lets face it; the sexes have never spoken the same language. If we did, wed still be running around naked and carefree in the Garden of Eden. The devil was a man, right? And when he told Eve, Nothing bad will happen if you bite that apple, what he really meant was, Nothing bad will happen to me if you bite that apple, but life is gonna suck for you. Thus making Eve the first woman to stupidly take a man at his word, but certainly not the last.

And we dont need a study to tell us that.

For all women looking for a long term relationship, I really mean it when I say you shouldn’t put your pussy on a platter.

So you met a really nice guy and he seems to fit all your needs and you had a great time. Inside, you really aren’t ready for all out intimacy but you throw yourself at him sexually because you think he won’t come back if you don’t.

Look, I’m all for a good time and if a good time is only what you’re looking for then by all means, do it and do it well. But, if you say you want a relationship, then saying to a man on your first date in words or actions “I want to fuck you,” might not be effective, especially if you’re having sex just because you think you should. You might get a good bedroom workout but not a call back.

If you’re serious about a guy, don’t put your girly bits on a platter for him to pick and choose. Don’t give him the impression (actuality?) that he doesn’t have to do anything to win you over because you’re offering everything up front. You’re worth working for, just as he is.

I’m not knocking recreational sex, by no means. I love sex and I’m all for having sex whenever the mood hits. However, if you are looking for something very special and you want a forever after relationship that includes great, hot sex, act like that’s what you want. There are a lot of men on this site that only want a roll in the hay and nothing more. Some will say anything to get it.

You know the type of man you’re looking for, so don’t lose focus. You’ll find exactly what you’re looking for and if we’re lucky, it will happen right here at SexyAds.

Fellatio. Lets not beat around the bush, ladiesour men love it, want it, and fantasize about it regularly. The problem: many women I know want to pleasure their men, but cant stomach the thought of swallowing. However, the last time I checked, all these women absolutely love to be on the receiving end of a little tongue action down there. So whats a girl to do? For the love of pleasure, reciprocation, and good sex, I thought Id share some ways to make it easy to blow without the blow.

Use your hands. Your mouth and tongue dont have to do all the work. Use your tongue and lips to spread saliva up and down his shaft to lube it up for your hands. Then, while you French-kiss his member, you can also stroke him with your hands and occasionally run your index finger over the head of his penis, the same way you might use your tongue. Pay attention to his breathing and physical cues to determine when he is about to come, then allow your hands to seamlessly take over where your mouth was, and let him come in the palm of your hand instead. Keep your mouth and face close to his erection; the wet and warm sensation is important. Whatever you do, dont stop the motion with your hands! Coming in your mouth is less important than continuing the stimulation up until the critical moment.

Get a facial. Have you ever watched porn with your lover? Youll notice that nine times out of ten, the hot action ends in a face shotwhen the dude ejaculates on her face. For a lot of men, this is HOT. Continue to use your hands, but instead of using your hand to prevent him from ejaculating in your mouth, keep your hands going and let him release on your face. Note: if you have watched porn flicks and are horrified by the amount of dew in his spew, dont be alarmed. Rumor has that most of these stunt men take serious zinc supplements to boost their output, so this doesnt reflect what you might expect from your partner.

Lube your boobs. Dont want to use your mouth? Use your breasts! Get some fabulous lubricant and juice up your cleavage. Then use your hands and breasts to surround him with some luscious bosom action. Hell likely take great pleasure writhing in your succulence, and wont even miss your mouth.

Its okay to spit. If youre concerned less about having him climax in your mouth and more about what to do with it if you can’t bear to swallow, be creative and keep a discreet spittoon handy. (A girlfriend once confessed that she fertilized the potted plant by the bed on occasion.) A tissue works just as well. Some women I know share the concern that spitting may send the wrong message to their man. I think the pleasure of coming in your mouth will overrule any negative feelings that may result from not swallowing. However, when it comes to intimacy in the bedroom, I think the most important thing is not to take our lovers feelings lightly, but to be respectful of any sensitivities. What he doesnt know wont hurt himbe subtle about it and everyone wins.

Give him hot licks on the side. Yet another variation of using your mouth and hands, but avoiding the sticky stuffsuckle his frenulum. Specifically, the area directly underneath his glans. This area is extremely responsive to light and soft stimulation. Put your sweet kisses here, continue stimulating with your hands as well, and aim his rocket toward his belly. Chances are he wont even notice hes not coming in your mouth.

Keep a chaser handy. Im talking whiskey. Swirl a bit in your mouth before going down on your manthat tingling warm sensation on your tongue is magnified on your mans sensitive skin, and can be a massive pleasure booster. When you bring him to orgasm, youve got a couple choices: youve got an instant antiseptic to quell any gag effect and youve got your discreet spittoon if you need one. Dont drink? No worries, try Chloraseptic throat spray or Mentos. Same tingly freshness.

Skip the swallow; go for the gullet. Okay, admittedly, this is a bonus round for women whose biggest issue with swallowing might be a psychological one. Im talking deep throating here. If you time it right, your throat will soften enough to let the head of his penis just past your uvula. Your natural inclination toward gulping motions will massage his corona in a way thats bound to bring him immense and immediate pleasure. The best part: any emissions from your man go straight down your throat without passing over your taste buds. Tips to make it easier: try bourbon, Chloraseptic, or even rinsing your mouth with childrens teething gel to numb the back of your throat. It will decrease your gag reflex, and allow you to relax and enjoy pleasing your lover.

Slurp!

I found a website filled with legends and myths about menstruation. How times have changed. One of the things is that women shouldn’t have sex during their periods. Today we know that many women who have sex during Aunty Flo’s visit report reduced cramping. Here are some of the myths.

• Hair washed during a gal’s period will not hold a curl; it will instead hang limp and ratty.
• Fruits or vegetables canned by a menstruating woman will spoil in the can.
• Visits to the dentist should be put off until after ‘the curse’ has passed, because fillings put in during this interval will fall out.
• Mayonnaise a menstruating woman has a hand in producing will not come together; it will instead curdle.
• Touching fruit trees during this time is prohibited because such contact will spoil the fruit even as it hangs on the tree.
• A gal experiencing ‘a visit from Aunt Flo’ should avoid going near wineries, lest her presence turn the wine into vinegar.
• Breadmaking will fail because the dough will refuse to rise.
• A girl enduring ‘the scourge of Eve’ mustn’t be allowed to take a turn at the butter churn because the butter will not “come,” that is, won’t form into a solid mass.
• Any jam or jelly a woman attempts to make at ‘that time of the month’ will fail to set.
• Hams hung to cure must not be touched by a woman during catamenia lest contact with her cause them to spoil.
• During her monthlies, a gal must not butcher meat lest she cause it to rot.

Additional taboos attempt to limit the activities of menstruating women:

• A gal experiencing her monthlies should not engage in sexual activity.
• A woman should not bathe or go swimming during Aunt Flo’s visit. (This one likely springs from a fear of contamination via menstrual blood’s being transmitted to the water where others are paddling or bathing.)
• A menstruating female should also be barred from joining any hunting party lest her presence scare off the game. (In theory, prey animals will scent her blood, which will send them scurrying. Were this the case, the deodorants, soaps, and detergents used by any of the expedition’s members would probably have long since put the wind up the tails of the hunted.)

My father always said that women couldn’t whip cream during their periods, it just wouldn’t thicken. He swore by it but I proved him wrong.