For all women looking for a long term relationship, I really mean it when I say you shouldn’t put your pussy on a platter.

So you met a really nice guy and he seems to fit all your needs and you had a great time. Inside, you really aren’t ready for all out intimacy but you throw yourself at him sexually because you think he won’t come back if you don’t.

Look, I’m all for a good time and if a good time is only what you’re looking for then by all means, do it and do it well. But, if you say you want a relationship, then saying to a man on your first date in words or actions “I want to fuck you,” might not be effective, especially if you’re having sex just because you think you should. You might get a good bedroom workout but not a call back.

If you’re serious about a guy, don’t put your girly bits on a platter for him to pick and choose. Don’t give him the impression (actuality?) that he doesn’t have to do anything to win you over because you’re offering everything up front. You’re worth working for, just as he is.

I’m not knocking recreational sex, by no means. I love sex and I’m all for having sex whenever the mood hits. However, if you are looking for something very special and you want a forever after relationship that includes great, hot sex, act like that’s what you want. There are a lot of men on this site that only want a roll in the hay and nothing more. Some will say anything to get it.

You know the type of man you’re looking for, so don’t lose focus. You’ll find exactly what you’re looking for and if we’re lucky, it will happen right here at SexyAds.

Nobody wants to think that anyone has been told that they’re a lousy lay, no matter how “above it all” someone might be. We all want to be good in bed — I think we’re born wanting that. Criticism of our carnal ability cuts like the sharpest knife.

If a guy is with a woman who fakes her orgasms like Meg Ryan, how’s he supposed to know that 3 years from now she’s going to say he was lousy in bed? If a guy gets off with a woman every time, how’s she supposed to know that 3 years from now he is telling people that fucking her is like rolling a peanut down a hallway?

Imagine how you’d feel if you were the proverbial fly on the wall when your ex-lover was trashing your “sack” record? What do you do when you’re faced with this situation? CAN you do anything when you’re sexual prowess is being called into question or do you keep on the low down until it all blows over?

Nobody has any respect for someone who does a kiss and tell. It’s tacky, immature and distasteful. Someone who does this has ZERO class. My advice is to put on a soft smile, look up and slowly shake your head. You’re saying, without saying, “I’ve got come class and I’m keeping my mouth shut about what a lousy piece of crap this person is and when it’s all over I’m going to be the one getting respect.” Firing back only leads others to think maybe there’s some truth to what was said.

How would you handle it if someone said you were lousy in the sack?

Are you forever falling short of his or her expectation? Do you always feel guilty about something you’ve done or not done or said or not said? People who are manipulated always feel that everything is their fault. It’s manipulation to shift the blame to you and which continually depletes your self-confidence. When you complain about things you’re told you’re making a mountain out of a molehill or accused of re-creating the inquisition.

Does your partner make you feel guilty for being upset by saying things like “You treat me like this after I spent x dollars taking you out to dinner? What kind of thanks is that?” Their bad behavior is never their fault – it will always be yours. You made me do it.

Do you feel like you’re walking on eggshells most of the time and breaking the eggs for no real reason? Whether you do something “wrong” or don’t do anything at all, there’s a big blowup and you try your best to smooth things over so everyone can relax. Sometimes you’re showered with affection and other times it’s like you don’t exist.
Maybe you don’t tell your partner about things you buy or places you’ve gone or are planning to go because you don’t want to face displeasure about any of it. It’s often easier to keep things a secret than go through the pain and discomfort of yet another harangue.

Are you unhappy at least 85% of the time but you keep getting reminded about the 15% of the time that things are good and how you wouldn’t want to give that up.

If any of this describes your relationship – you’re with a manipulator and sad as it is to hear, it will most probably never change. Nobody is a born manipulator — it’s all learned and probably from early childhood which makes changing that behavior next to impossible. You’d be better off learning ways to protect yourself from it or move on to a relationship with a lot less stress.

Don’t waste your time wondering how you got hooked up with this goofhead, it doesn’t matter, but it’s probably because you’re a pleaser and maybe have a lack of self-worth and self-confidence

If a few or more of these statements described your relationship, you’re likely with a manipulator, and the bad news is, he is unlikely to change.

“Manipulation is a learned behavior — no one is born with it. It’s very much a survival strategy learned from early childhood and therefore changing the behavior is near impossible,” says Casey. “Your time is better invested in developing strategies to protect yourselves, because you can never change a manipulator’s actions.

In other words, dump the jerk and then look into how you attracted him in the first place. People who attract manipulators tend to lack self-worth and assertiveness, and they tend to be people pleasers. They hope things will change until they sit back and realize how long they have been unhappy. You’ll never be the person he or she wants you to be – so dump them and become the person YOU want to be.

Most couples will say yes but with reservations. Those of us who enjoy a bit of porn from time to time look at pornography as a watch and learn — a way to bet a few tips. One thing I’ll never emulate is the Ooh, Ooh, Ahh, Ahh fakey crap that happens in too many blue movies. Seriously, how many times does a real woman make noises like that?

Movies can give you ideas on new positions, role playing, sexual techniques and for heaps of women, start the engines revving before the race to the finish gets started.

Do you watch porn? Alone or together with your lover? Do you have favorites?