We’ve always known that men masturbate. It’s talked about from the time you’re a teenager. Women masturbate too but only in the past 20-25 years have women begun talking about it. Turns out all of us enjoy a bit of self pleasure from time to time.

Masturbating helps us learn how our bodies respond and what sexual triggers our partners can use to enhance or increase our sexual pleasure. Solo sex can be rewarding and if you do it in front of your partner it can lift the experience ten fold. It also allows your partner/spouse to know what type of touch turns you on.

Men who masturbate frequently are better able to maintain their erections and can also help delay ejaculation for a longer period of time. It’s all about being in tune with your body, letting you learn what makes you tick through self discovery.

We know that couples who’ve been in a relationship for a long time occasionally aren’t in the mood always at the same time. Rather than having sex when you don’t feel like it, accept that you don’t always need each other for sexual gratification. Sometimes ripping one off by yourself is okay and sometimes mutual masturbation can be a fun time. Masturbating with your partner brings a level of intimacy that brings you closer together.

Do you or have you masturbated with your partner? Was it good?

Statement: Women always take longer to reach orgasm than men.

Fact: Hogwash. If you take a man and a woman who are both at peak arousal, they will reach orgasm at roughly the same time. The people who make the previous statement measure a woman’s time to reach orgasm from when she’s making a cake to reaching heaven in the throes of passion. The truth is that it takes a woman longer to get from square one to full arousal than it takes a man. A man can be fully aroused in a matter of seconds and he’s ready to storm the gate.

So for the man who wants his partner to be fully engaged and meet him in ecstasy, he needs to help her reach that arousal state. Foreplay is much more than taking your clothes off for most all women. If a woman can reach orgasm by masturbating, she can reach orgasm through vaginal sex. If they can’t then they aren’t getting the type of clitoral stimulation that they need.

A lot of men can get frustrated when they have trouble getting their wife or partner in the mood for sexual intimacy. Do men really have stronger sex drives than women? Yes, they do. Most men seem to be able to be aroused at the peek of a boob through a sleeveless blouse. Sadly, most women aren’t that easily turned on.

Women place more value on emotional connection as a spark of sexual desire. We are more easily stimulated when we feel sensual, sexy, and attractive as a woman. Of course every relationship is different but what we see in blogs and ads and forum posts, it appears that quite a lot of men have trouble getting their lover/spouse interested in sex when they want it.

Here are some ideas to help men to become closer and more intimate so their sex lives can be healthy and satisfying for both partners.

* Show appreciation – be specific and clear by noticing and expressing your gratitude for her. Notice when she’s done something for you. Remember that she didn’t sign on to be your maid and maybe you should let her know that her attention to your stuff is appreciated.

* Be kind, considerate, and compassionate, – noticing and caring for her needs; treat her as you did when you first were in love.

* Let her know that you desire her – be open as you allow yourself to be vulnerable.

* Take some notice of the wonderful traits she has that you love her for – and share what you notice with her.

* Compliment her – what is beautiful about your wife? Notice her physical beauty as well as her character, mind, creativity, etc. The more sexy a woman feels the more she is inclined to desire physical intimacy. Tell her she’s sexy.

* Tell her how important she is to you – it is often difficult for a woman to want to be intimate when she does not feel important or significant.

* Let her know she is the most important person in your life – women respond best when they feel they are the most significant woman in your life.

* Be affectionate – in non-sexual ways without an ulterior motive. It will tell her that she’s important to you in other ways than sexual.

These suggestions are not ways to get in her pants. Women know when you’re doing that. These are ideas to bring a closeness to the relationship that will ultimately lead to a spicier sex life. Bless you wife/partner and she will want to bless you too.

I say again that for me, the sexiest man on the planet is the one helping with the dishes or sweeping the patio or feeding the cats. It means that these jobs aren’t mine because I have a set of tits. These are our chores because we share this space together.

I know that some of you will say that you’re doing all these things and you’re still not getting sex. If that’s the case, I’m afraid there’s a lot more wrong with your relationship than not getting enough sex.

So often we hear about the size of a man’s penis and whether big is better. Some women are convinced that unless they have a big penis inside them, they haven’t had good sex. Many other women say it’s not the size but the experience that makes all the difference to them. Remember this “It’s not the size of the organ, it’s the cathedral it plays in”.

This was written in the forum a while back and I think it’s still relevant.

Let’s talk about the size of a woman’s vagina.

The Kama Sutra (an ancient Indian book about sex) uses three terms to describe the size of women’s vagina. The three terms are rather like simplifying a bell curve, one that is divided into only three parts, rather than a smooth infinite curve like we discussed above. The Kama Sutra uses the terms “Rabbit,” “Doe,” and “Elephant” to describe the range of sizes of a women’s vagina. Obviously a woman with a vagina the size of a rabbit would have a small and probably shallow vagina. A woman with a vagina the size of a doe (a female deer) would have a medium size, and a woman labeled an elephant would have a deep and probably loose vagina.

So let’s say that Mr Right marries Ms Cute. And let’s say that Mr Right has a penis that is of average size. But lets say that Ms Cute has a vagina that is best described as an elephant vagina. Obviously those relative sizes are not the most opportune fit. Ms Cute’s vagina on the other hand could easily accommodate a very large penis. She may be what you currently hear described as a “Size Queen.” In other words, her vagina requires a larger penis to feel stimulated. That is not a statement about the size or adequacy of her husband’s penis so much as it is a statement about the size of her vagina.

Lets say on the other hand that same Mr Right marries Ms Tiny, who has a tiny vaginy. Mr Right would not be able to put his whole penis inside her without causing her discomfort and quite likely bladder infections.

My point is this, you CANNOT talk about the “inadequate” size of a man’s penis without also objectively describing the size of the woman’s vagina. Just as penises come in all sizes and girths, so do vaginas.